If I were a boy...

If I were a boy…now I am sure that when you saw the title of this blog you thought what in the world is going on in this woman’s head!!! Yeah it happened to me too, but I heard the song earlier and it made me think. What would some of the benefits be if I could be a boy sometime…hmmmm…

Let’s examine a few of these things…fellas please know that I love you all, but you all get some perks that women aren’t always afforded. Anywho…

If I were a boy…

1.     I would be able to do sh!t for no good reason.  Wouldn’t it be nice to do whatever I wanted and not have to give a reason other than it was what I wanted to do. Must be nice…right!!! As a woman I can’t really say well I cheated because it was his body was available, or I didn’t wash clothes because I didn’t want to…now granted I could do those things, but think about it. Men can do those things and it is ok ALL THE TIME. When women do it  the world is coming to an end…can we say double standard… I can!

2.     I could not answer my phone and no one would give a d@mn…let me not answer my phone…people are texting me, emailing, asking “Are you ok?” “What’s wrong” “WHY YOU NOT ANSWEING YOUR PHONE” How about I just don’t feel like talking. Just because you have a penis you can say “my phone was off!” now what…WTH!!! No explanation, just because you said so…I just don’t get it.

3.     I could go stay out all night and blame it on the alcohol…women…stay out all night and blame it on the alcohol and see what people call you! Just be careful of who is calling you…they might be offering more alcohol in hopes of getting you out all night again. LOL!

4.     I could blame not taking care of my responsibilities (kids mainly) on the fact that I am not together personally…bullsh!t…as a mom…together or not I have a job that has to be done and no one gives two good flicks if I am not together. WORK MUST STILL BE DONE…MOMMY DUTY GETS NO BREAK!

5.     I could have a million and one girls and be the main man in my “crew” but as a woman…have a bunch of dudes and you will never get married! You better stay your butt alone and not get caught up with a whole bunch of dudes or you will be doomed lol

6. I would pee outside...NOW  THIS thought was brought up by my cousin Toya, but it is so true...I would to be able to just go around a tree or on the side of the building and not expose all of my beautiful goodies to the world. While I know that men are excited every time a woman goes the bathroom outside but us women would love to just pull over, whip out, and go on site...that must be a GREAT feeling!

Now, I don't really want to be a boy because I ABSOLUTELY love being me and being a girl but sometime I sure would like to be able to put on a d!ck and balls suit and be a man for just a while to see what life is like on the other side. I’m sure I could only stomach all the groupies, fake friends and laziness for a moment, but it sure would allow me to understand what the heck y’all men think about a little better.

Just a bit of humor on my mind even though I didn’t laugh once when writing this…lol! Hell who cares in the words of Stevie J ‘It’s my bus, my air and my gas…” I can’t stand him by the way!

LOVE LIFE!!!!